Mga Sumasampalataya

Dec 5, 2009


The week that went by, in a word, was crappy. From the confusion from the break up, to all the stress that's caused by my new job (can't even browse the web during office hours because of all the tasks needed to be done), and lastly having to go through a heartbreak three times over the course of the last five days.

The heartbreak came not in ending a relationship. The heartbreak is because we had to end a wonderful friendship. This was a mutual understanding because things got so complicated between the two of us. Until this, I never knew how difficult going through a real heartbreak is. Specially when you both decide to end it, not because you hate each other, but because you both love each other so much you need to give way for the other to be happy.

Losing a great friend is always harder than having to go through a break up. It may be only a temporary thing, but when that person occupied a huge part of your heart, it's devastating. But from the start, when we started the relationship, we agreed we will do what is right. And if letting go is what will make that person happy, then I will give way.

I'm an eternal optimist, and I'm sure in time, I will be fine. But these days, I feel that all my tomorrows will be gray.

If there ever was a thing that I regret about the whole thing last night, it's that I wasn't able to properly say goodbye. I didn't want to cry again, that's what I've been doing since Wednesday. I hope my friend will be reading this, because this is the best way for me to say goodbye.

Every moment I spent with you, no matter how light or how heavy our conversations were, no matter how drama, emo, cheesy or crazy they all were, every one of those I'll keep in my heart. You make me happy and I will never ever forget you. I will miss all the long talks, all the kwento, corny jokes and the games we play over the phone.

Although we decided to part ways for the meantime, I will always be your friend. I will be here whenever you need someone to talk to. I look forward to the day when everything will be clear and we can go back to the way we used to be. No complications, only genuine friendship.

I wish you nothing but happiness. With or without me, I hope life will be good. I want you to enjoy your life. And I look forward to the day when you find out what you want in your life, even if that does not include me. Don't think of how people will see you, just do what makes you happy. And may you find the person that will complete you.

Just remember, I will always love you. Don't worry too much about me, like I promised I will be okay. It may take some time, but I'll get there. We will get there.

Thank you that even for a short time, you shared your life with me.

I look forward until the time we meet again.



engel said...

Today officially I end all the drama.

I think. =)

Anonymous said...

i thought goodbye kna sa blog mo na to!haha!=)

go kuya engel kaya yan!=) smile!


Vladimir Buendia said...

i have the same feeling. the same pain. the same kind of heartbreak. i don't know what to think about now. or how i should act. can i still continue my life? i don't know. this is getting harder and harder each day.

Anonymous said...

funny, after reading your post, i thought of my own break up months ago.

and i had a sudden realization:

goodbyes were not exchanged that day, only thank yous.

xallternative said...

Hearing break ups make me sad...

Yj said...

i love how this post ended.... positivity rules!

Anonymous said...

You love him, he loves you. I hope you can still work it out. It's never too late until one has to give up.

Eternal Wanderer... said...

i'm glad you now choosing to be happy :)


Rei Mikazuki said...

When we say goodbye to a person we love, we should always say goodbye once, wave our hand once, and then turn the other way around and quickly walk away from them. 'Cause the longer we bade our goodbyes from them, the harder it gets for us to be on our way and move on.

Pang-end sa emo mode ha.

Anonymous said...

a heartbreak three times over the course of the last five days.

hmmmm... sino-sino sila?

hugh said...

consider yourself lucky. there are some who didn't get a chance to have a good break-up.

Anonymous said...

hugs for engel!

- Darc

citybuoy said...

i think it's a little sad but it's very sweet too. i hope you guys become friends in the future.

Alex Forrest said...

hmmm. i'm missing something.

i'm sorry to ask this (maybe i'm just dumb not to read between the lines) but why did you have to end a beautiful friendship?