Mga Sumasampalataya

Aug 30, 2006

ENTRY 43: NOT MEANT TO BE

The past few of days have been a roller coaster ride. I did not fall in love... Almost did, but unfortunately, it did not fall through...

REASON: It was not meant to be...

I met Lyanne in the chatroom a few days ago... The whole thing was wrong from the very beginning, come to think of it... We already were wrong for each other from the moment I received my first text message from her.
But I guess boredom would make you settle for anything less than you expected or wanted. We still texted each other, simply because there's no one else to text, or talk to... It turned out, in some way, there were things that the two of have in common... We were sweet to each other that she even called me 'dadz'. We decided to meet the next day...

Long story short, she was not that much into me, looks wise. Being dumped several times in my life already, I would know... She's not different with the other people who's turned me down... Yes, she looked nice and hot... and I looked like a drab... No effort from my part... But I believe that anyone who would like me when I looked my worst, likes me sincerely... I knew that she didn't but I turned a blind eye hoping that what I had to offer was enough to woe her into liking me...

It was stupid, and I know that... So yesterday I texted her about my status... THis is how the text conversation went...

Me: ilan ang nanliligaw sayo, o kaya yung nagpaparamdam?
Lyanne: 4
Me: kasama na ako dyan?
Lyanne: Nop
Me: Ang dami! So kung irank mo kami, pang-ilan ako?
Lyanne: Di ko masasabi, lahat kayo nasa getting to know each other stage pa lang...
Me: Okay, so pag nag-exert ba ako ng effort para ligawan ka, may pag-asa ba ako?
Lyanne: You don't have to just be yourself.
Me: Now that's my problem with you di ko nafifeel na you want to get to know me better.
Lyanne: That's up to you. Kung gusto mo friends muna tayo.
Me: Wow! Salamat!
Me: No offense meant, but I deserve better. I sincerely hope na mahanap dun sa 4 yung taong magmamahal sayo ng totoo.
Lyanne: if you're not going to say anything nice to me, then spare me!
Me: Im just being realistic, but ako pag nagmahal ako binibigay ko ang lahat... Now, kung hindi kayang suklian ng taong mahal ko yung mga iaalay ko, then she does not deserve my love...

end of texts...

Am I being a jerk? But in my defense, pinaasa niya ako...

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

I just couldn't resist posting a comment since this has happened to me too, years ago during the early days of the net and irc. You're lucky you never fell for the girl so it was easy for you to let go.

gillboard said...

makes you want to think twice about relationships that starts through chat...

Anonymous said...

Yes, there's always the risk of disappointment on both sides when meeting up. Back then there were lots of nice people you can actually be friends with. I just dunno now.

Anonymous said...

yan ang mahirap pag nagsimula sa chat/text...mas maganda siguro kung habang di pa kayo nagmi-meet nang harapan eh friends lang talaga muna, wala munang flirting...that way, mas makikilala nyo yung tao as a person, not as a potential bf/gf... then pag nag-meet na at meron talagang spark, saka na lang nyo i-elevate ang status :)

cyberpunk said...

yan ang mahirap pag nagsimula sa chat/text...mas maganda siguro kung habang di pa kayo nagmi-meet nang harapan eh friends lang talaga muna, wala munang flirting...that way, mas makikilala nyo yung tao as a person, not as a potential bf/gf... then pag nag-meet na at meron talagang spark, saka na lang nyo i-elevate ang status :)

Dream of the Blue Wind said...

sheesh, coach... i don't know what to say...but if there's anything that I learned during my stint at ICT, it's never to expect anything at all I'm talking about what I did last Christmas and I think I'm going to do it again this year...*wink wink*

I'm still not expecting anything to happen. I'm very happy the way things are.^^