MEN: WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT US

I think it's only fair, after me whining about women a couple of months ago to write about us men. While surfing the web, earlier, I found some interesting points about us guys. Some of the things I'll be writing came from Rita Rudner's 50 Facts About Men and the others are from Danielle Hollister.

• MEN ACCEPT COMPLIMENTS MUCH BETTER THAN WOMEN DO

When you tell a man he looks good, he accepts the compliment and thanks you quickly. But if you tell a woman she looks pretty, she'll raise her eyebrow, look suspicious and bombard you with questions; don't you think this dress makes me look fat? ows? bola? leche ka, nangaasar ka nanaman!!!

• IF A MAN SAYS "I'LL CALL YOU," AND HE DOESN'T, HE DIDN'T FORGET... HE DIDN'T LOSE YOUR NUMBER... HE DIDN'T DIE. HE JUST DIDN'T WANT TO CALL YOU.

This is a part of our script during dates. Aside from the compliments and all the good things we say about ourselves, we're programmed to say "I'll call you" no matter how bad our date turned out to be. Sometimes, even if we never got your number. Like I've been telling myself lately, the secret to happiness is lowered expectations.

• WHEN FOUR OR MORE MEN GET TOGETHER, THEY TALK ABOUT SPORTS.

Only if we ran out of things to say about our favorite teams, do we tend to talk about women, sex, and (gasp!) office gossip. But it's always on the menu that when guys get together the first thing we talk about are last night's game.

• ALL MEN THINK THEY'RE NICE GUYS. SOME OF THEM ARE NOT.

I'm not one of them. I really am nice. Yeah right. I actually agree with this. I came from an all-boys school my entire life, and the biggest jerks in school, when they get into a huge fight with anyone, defends themselves by saying that they're actually nice to the other. I'm actually a jerk.

• MARRIED MEN LIVE LONGER THAN SINGLE MEN. BUT MARRIED MEN ARE A LOT MORE WILLING TO DIE.

If only to escape the never-ending nagging ang blabbering of their wives. Makes me think twice about getting hitched myself. Sometimes I think maybe I'm better off single than married. I mean if you could have sex with no strings attached, why get married and be chained to one woman for the rest of your life, right? I guess I just need to meet the right one.

• A MAN NEVER WORRIES ABOUT THE FUTURE UNTIL HE GETS A WIFE.

Men are naturally carefree... until the first baby comes their way. Then we have to worry about the kids education, food at the table, whatever his wife wants him to buy for her and saving for the future. Ergo, women keeps the guys from being fun to be with. Seriously.

• MEN WAKE UP AS GOOD-LOOKING AS THEY WENT TO BED. WOMEN SOMEHOW DETERIORATE DURING THE NIGHT.

Must be the hair. But I agree, rarely do I see a woman who looks great after waking up from slumber. Sleeping beauty is really just a fairy tale.

• MEN HATE TO LOSE.

We' re generally born competitive. We might not show it, but deep down inside, it really kills us when we lose. So if you're out on a date, and then you let him lose, and then he says "I'll call you." Don't expect anything anymore.

But then again, what woman tries to understand a man? Seriously? We are what we are. We may be pigs, asses, the biggest jerks, but we could also be romantic, sweet and handy to have around with.

REQUIRED READING: WATCHMEN

March is still a long wait away, but if you've seen The Dark Knight the past couple of weeks, you may have glimpsed a trailer for another super hero movie... Watchmen. Nerds around the world cried with glee with scenes straight from the comic book itself.

According to the trailer, this is the most acclaimed graphic novel in history.

Watchmen is set in an alternative earth in the 80's, where vigilantism is outlawed, and the planet is in the brink of World War 3. When one of the former heroes is brutally murdered, those who are left brought it to themselves to find out what's causing this and who's methodically taking out all of the other super-heroes. This graphic novel is not just about heroics, it deals about alot of deeper aspects like rape, the morality of omnipotence, how one is considered insane, and doing something bad for the greater good. Watchmen is proof that comic books and super heroics are not just books for kids. It's intelligently written by the legendary Allan Moore, and drawn by the equally brilliant Dave Gibbons.

I've heard about this title when I was still new to the whole comics collecting hobby. But it was only last year that I've really read the title. It's actually difficult to read this in only one sitting because of all the ideas being brought up by this title. But I'm not saying that it's hard to understand. To be honest, people smarter than I am will appreciate this more, but it's easy to comprehend. Like I've said the writing is superb. You get the aspects of who the characters are. And each one has a distinct voice from the others. From the very powerful Dr. Manhattan, the smartest man Ozymandias, to the desperation of Nite Owl and the edgy Rorschach everyone has weight.

Artistically this is the comics version of Da Vinci, or a great indie film. The angles are something new. The type that'll really get your mind to work. This is a series where you just don't ogle at the pictures. Yes, the pictures are pretty, but it's beauty that you'll more than just appreciate. I love how Gibbons does the different perspectives of the same subject. Scenes like Dr. Manhattan's Mars home, to love scenes are drawn artistically that you'll get affected by it's brilliance.

There is a reason why this is hailed as a classic. Some of the points introduced by this series are still fresh 23 years after it was first released. Marvel's Civil War and DC's Identity Crisis in a way took a page from this seller. At it's release, it won the prestigious Hugo Award, as well as an Eisner and Kirby awards.

Honestly, I'm worried about the movie that's about to come out. It was Moore who said that this was not written to be adapted in the big screen, and I agree. It's really going to be difficult to sell this as an action film, because it's not. It's more of a thinking man's noir story. Zach Snyder did a lot to impress us with 300 and Dawn of the Dead, so I have high hopes for this film. I'm not expecting too much, but I really hope that the film be loyal to the story and not be like Wanted which is the same about the comic book only in it's first 10 minutes. But judging by what I've seen with the trailer, it could be a direct adaptation. So at least it should be good, story-wise

Watchmen's got it all for everyone, gore and violence, all-out action from beginning to the end, and steamy love scenes in the middle.

SCORE: 8.5 out of 10

PROLOGUE

Featured Friend number 2 is a go. Hopefully he replies faster than Jaja with my little questionnaire. If all goes well, this'll be posted 1st week of August. The guy's pretty demanding as this conversation proves:

FEATURED FRIEND: i want it as sophisticated as jajas
FEATURED FRIEND: :)
FEATURED FRIEND: gusto ko mejo heavy comedy ung buhay ko
FEATURED FRIEND: like sa novels
FEATURED FRIEND: ideas
FEATURED FRIEND: on how to convey my life story
FEATURED FRIEND: or tell it
FEATURED FRIEND: tingin mo?
GILLBOARD: basta ako na bahala dun... at wala akong balak ikwento buhay mo no
FEATURED FRIEND: i want my blog to be colourful in a sense na ive been through alot and its never ending but for me its still a a comedy
GILLBOARD: ah ok
FEATURED FRIEND: parang sarcastic na may meaning ung dating
FEATURED FRIEND: like in movies
GILLBOARD: sure... ipapakita ko naman sayo draft before i post it
FEATURED FRIEND: ayt excited nako ang galing nito ah

I've started with a draft already for this one. I pray that this one gets published earlier!!!

And hopefully tomorrow I'll have a decent entry. Probably something about the Watchmen...

But for now, I'll leave you with a peak at my next Featured Friend... Enjoy!!!

11 PALAPAG

Ikalabing-isang palapag.

“Kuya, sigurado ka bang matibay yan?” ang sabi ng kapatid ko. Nag-aalala na baka may mangyaring masama sa akin.

“Hindi tayo makakaalis dito kung wala tayong gagawin.” Sabi ko sa kapatid ko.

Kelangan kong umakyat dahil hindi mabuksan ang pinto mula sa balkonahe namin. Hindi namin pwedeng sirain ang pintuan at mahal ang magpagawa.

Ikasampung palapag.

“Oh, ticket mo. Para makabisita ka kina Mama at Papa.” Sambit ng kapatid ko habang inaabot ang tiket na makakapagdala sa akin sa aming probinsya.

Anim na buwan na nang huli kong makita ang aking ama at ina. Anim na buwan na rin mula nang iwan ko ang aking magiging mag-ina.

Siguro malaki na ang tiyan ng mahal ko. Makakauwi na ulit ako ng probinsya. Matagal ko ding hinintay ito.

May singsing na din ako.

Ikasiyam na palapag.

“Magiging tatay ka na Ferds.” Ang sabi ng kasintahan ko. Sa mga panahong iyon, hindi ko alam kung matatakot ba ako. Bata pa ako, at hindi pa handa na magkaroon ng sariling pamilya. Kailangan ako ng mga kapatid ko, at wala pang matinong trabaho.

Masaya ako. Pero hindi ko sinabi. Alam ko masasaktan siya kapag wala akong sasabihin. Tanging ngiti lang ang kaya kong ibigay.

“Pupunta ako ng Manila. Kelangan ako ng kapatid ko.” Ang tanging nasambit ko. Hindi ko sigurado kung kailan ko siya makikita muli.

Magiging tatay na ako.

Ikawalong palapag.

“Kuya this is my husband.” Pinakilala sa akin ng kapatid ko ang asawa niya. Mayaman yung Hapon. Mukhang maiaahon niya ang pamilya namin sa kahirapan. Magiging maluwat na ang buhay namin.

Masaya ako para sa kapatid ko. Maligaya ako para sa pamilya ko.

Ikapitong palapag.

Madalas akong bumisita sa bahay ng tiyahin ko. At ang hilig kong gawin ay gulatin ang pinsan ko. Ngayong gabi, nanunuod ng nakakatakot na palabas ito.

Nakita ako ng tiyahin ko. Sinenyasan ko na huwag siyang maingay. Tahimik akong pumuwesto sa likod ng pinsan ko.

Tumalon ako sa kama para gulatin ito. Umiyak ang pinsan ko.

“Aaaah, kuya!!!” ilang beses ko bang napaiyak itong batang ito. Pinagalitan ako kunwari ng tiyahin ko. Mapatahan lang ang pinsan ko.

Ikaanim na palapag.

“Nanay, nag-aaway sina kuya Fernando!!!” sumisigaw ang kapatid ko. Alam namin ni kuya, na di dapat kami mahuli ng magulang naming nag-aaway. Oo nga’t matanda na kami, pero hindi pa rin kami makakatakas sa sinturon ng tatay ko.

Babae ang dahilan ng hindi namin pagkakasundo ni kuya. Huwag daw akong maghahabol sa mga babae, dahil hahadlang lang daw ito sa pag-aaral ko.

Kasundo ko ang kapatid ko sa halos lahat ng bagay. Pero pagdating dito, hindi talaga kami magkasundo.

Padating na ang nanay namin. Di kami dapat maabutan ng ganito. Bumukas ang pinto…

Ikalimang palapag.

Hinalikan ko siya. Lumuluha siya, ito ang unang pagkakataon namin magkasama. Isang taon na rin kaming magkasintahan. Mahal ko ang babaeng ito, at balang araw ay pakakasalan ko siya.

“Wag kang aalis sa tabi ko,” bulong niya sa akin.

"I love you." ang sagot ko. Niyakap niya ako ng mahigpit. Ito ang pinakamaligayang araw sa buhay ko.

Ikaapat na palapag

“Oo. Tayo na” sambit ng babaeng halos isang taon kong niligawan. Lahat ng paghihirap ko ay nagbunga din sa wakas.

Natatakot siya dahil mga bata pa kami. Pinagsasabihan siya ng mga kaibigan niya na mag-ingat sa akin, at palikero daw ako. Maraming babaeng pinaiyak. Hindi mapagkakatiwalaan.

Pinakita ko na kaya kong magbago. Na handa akong ialay ang puso ko sa kanya lang.

Pinangako kong hindi na ako titingin sa iba pang babae. Hindi ko siya iiwan.

Ngayong araw ay sobra ang saya ko.

Ikatatlong palapag.

Tumatakbo ako. Kelangan makahanap ng matataguan. Hindi ako dapat Makita ng tiyo ko.

Nabasag namin ng kapatid ko ang lalagyan ng litrato ng lolo ko. Tiyak pag nahuli kami nito, paluluhurin kami sa asin. Kagaya ng ginagawa sa kanila ng lolo ko.
Tumalon ang kapatid ko sa balon. Lalo kaming malalagot nito. Naririnig kong, humingi ng tulong ang kapatid ko.

Hindi ako dapat mahuli. Kailangan kong tumakbo.

“Fernando!!!” sigaw ng tito ko. “ Kuya, tulong!!!” naririnig ko ang hiyaw ng kapatid ko. Nakita ko ang tiyuhin ko, may dalang tungkod ni lolo.

“Kuyaaaa!!!” pero kailangan kong magtago.

Ikalawang palapag.

Iminulat ko ang mga mata ko sa unang pagkakataon. Isa itong bagong mundo. Malayo sa nakagisnan ko. Maliwanag. Maingay. Madaming mga bagay na kakaiba. Malamig.

“Lalake” sabi ng isang babae

Natatakot ako, pero hindi ako masabi. Tanging pag-iyak lang ang kaya kong gawin para ipaalam na hindi ako sanay sa bagong mundong pinuntahan ko.

Binuhat ako ng isang lalaki. Pinunasan, at binalot sa telang puti. Tumahan ako sa pag-iyak.

“Fernando.”

Ang buong buhay ko ay nakita ko. Maraming hindi pa nagagawa. Marami pa akong kailangan balikan. Tatay na ako. Hindi ko man lang nasulyapan ang anak ko.

Hindi pa kami nagkakabati ng kuya ko… Hindi ko pa natutupad ang pangako ko sa babaeng mahal ko.

Ipinikit ko ang mga mata ko.

Panginoon ko… tulungan mo ako.

**********

February 1990, my cousin fell from the 11th floor of the condo unit that he and his sister were staying in. Two months later, his brother died from a motorcycle accident.
The other night, as I lay on my bed, I thought about him. As a kid, he was my favorite cousin. He always makes me laugh, and my parents have nothing but praise about him.
I don’t know why it’s him that I thought of. It was my grandmother’s death anniversary, but it was Kuya Fernando that I remembered.

They say moments before you die, you’ll see your entire life flash before your eyes. I reckon, this may be how he felt during the fall. This is a work of fiction. I didn’t have the time to get to know him better. I wish I did.

KWENTO NG GABI

Ang sumusunod ay mga maiikling kwento ng katatakutan na aking narinig mula sa mga kaibigan, kamag-anak at sa radyo na gusto kong ibahagi sa inyo.

***************

1995: 12:30am. Matutulog na kami noon nang may biglang kumatok sa gate namin. Nang silipin ko sa bintana, 2 kapitbahay namin na mukhang takot na takot. Pinapasok sila ng nanay ko. Mukhang pagod yung dalawa. Nang tanungin ng nanay ko kung ano yung nangyari, at bakit sila nagkakaganun...

Naghahanda raw silang matulog din, galing sila sa amin dahil may bisita kaming kamag-anak nila. Nang takdang papatayin nila yung ilaw, may nakita silang lalaking duguan na pilit hinihila yung grills ng bintana nila. Nang sinigawan ni Kuya yung lalaki, tiningnan daw sila ng masama, at tumakbo palabas. Hinabol ng dalawa yung lalaki, pero paglabas nila ng bahay, wala silang nakitang tao.

Imposibleng hindi nila maabutan yun dahil mataas yung bakod nila at di kayang akyatin dahil walang maaapakan. Walang mapagtataguan yung lalaki kung sakaling nakatakbo siya sa kalsada. At imposibleng makaakyat sa bubong yung mama, dahil magcocause yun ng ingay. Saka lang naisip ng kuya ko na baka multo yung nakita nila, kaya dagli silang tumakbo papunta sa amin.

***************

May isang lalaking pumunta sa isang party sa isang village sa Quezon City. Sa sasakyan palang, eh hindi na maganda ang pakiramdam niya. Para bang may nagbabantay sa kanya. Parang may mabigat sa dibdib, na hindi niya malaman ang dahilan.

Dumating naman siya sa bahay ng kaibigan niya, pero dahil maraming bisita ito, napilitan siyang magpark ng sasakyan sa dulo ng kalsada, kung saan medyo madilim. May mga tao sa may kalsada, pero ang taong nakaagaw ng pansin niya eh yung babaeng nag-iisa sa tabi ng sasakyan ng isang kakilala niya. Inisip ng binata na isa nanaman ito sa mga babaeng pinaglalaruan ang damdamin ng kaibigan niya.

Pero nanginig siya nang magkita sila sa mata. Ang dalaga ay nanlilisik sa pagtitig sa kanya. Lalong bumigat ang pakiramdam ng binata. Umiwas na lang ito sa pagtingin at naglakad patungo sa bahay ng kaibigan. Pumasok na ang mga tao sa paligid na kanina'y nakita niya. Nang ilang hakbang na lang siya sa tahanan ng kaibigan, lumingon ito upang tingnan ang sasakyan niya.

Nagulat ito nang makita ang babae sa loob ng kotse niya na hanggang sa pagkakataong iyon ay nakatingin pa rin sa kanya ng masama. Tumakbo ito papunta sa mga kaibigan upang magsumbong at ibalita ang tungkol sa nakita. Pagbalik nila sa labas, wala nang tao sa sasakyan.

Doon na natulog ang binata sa bahay ng kaibigan.

***************

Sa dati kong opisina sa Ortigas, sa sleeping quarters ng mga babae, maraming kwento ng kababalaghan akong narinig. Ang sabi ng aking mga katrabaho, may tatlong multo na naninirahan doon. Isang lalake, isang babae at isang batang babae.

Isang gabi, alas siyete nang dumating sa opisina para matulog ang isa kong kaibigan. 2 pa lang ang taong natutulog doon. Pumuwesto siya sa higaan na malapit sa bintana. May ilang minuto na siyang nakahiga, pero hindi pa rin siya dinadapuan ng antok, hanggang sa umabot ang alas-9. Yun ata yung simula ng shift ng dalawang kasama niya. Wala pang ibang dumarating upang matulog, kaya naiwan siyang mag-isa.

2 oras mahigit na siyang nakahiga, pero di pa rin siya makatulog. Umiiba-iba siya ng pwesto ng paghiga pero wala pa ring nangyayari. "Wag kang malikot!" narinig niyang may bumulong sa kanya. Bumangon bigla ang kaibigan ko sa takot, at lumabas. Di niya kayang magstay sa loob ng mag-isa.

Naghintay siya sa labas na may pumasok upang matulog. At nang may dumating na 3 pang babae para matulog, pumasok na ulit siya. Di pa nagtatagal ng makaidlip siya na may gumigising sa kanya. Inaalog ang balikat niya, at ng maalimpungatan, napansin niyang walang ibang tao. Tulog ang tatlo niyang kasama. Pero antok na antok na siya kaya hindi na niya pinansin yun. Kunsabagay, maaaring panaginip niya lang yon.

Paggising niya bago magsimula ang trabaho, nang tingnan niya ang telepono niya, may nareceive itong isang picture message. Ito eh litrato niya habang natutulog ito. At nagmula yung message sa number niya.

***************

There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio,
Than are dreamt of in your philosophy.
-Hamlet

I AM BATMAN!!! (SPOILERS AHOY)

I haven't been able to post here for a few days because I haven't had a decent internet connection for 3 days now. But enough about that, my weekend's lousy anyway.

The reason why I'm posting a new one now is to profess my love to Batman!!! Oh yes, I've seen the movie... it's awesome!!! Two and a half hours of pure genius.

The Dark Knight takes place probably months after the first film. Gotham City has a new knight sweeping the streets clean of mobsters and criminals in the form of new District Attorney Harvey Dent. The only way for the mobs to actually stay in business is to enlist the help of a deranged sociopath named Joker. The villains actually succeed and even effectively plants seeds of doubt on whether the city really needs a hero like Batman. And that's actually just the first half of the film.

What I like about The Dark KNight is that it's got a very rich story. WHen you thought that the story reaches it's climax, another thing happens that takes it to the next level. Christopher Nolan directed possibly my favorite film of the year. People might expect senseless violence when they watch the film, but I don't think that's the case. Yes, buildings explode, people die violent deaths, and a lot of people shoot each other up, but it's not in a way that people expect. Actually, thinking about it, the film is in the same league as Michael Mann's films. Fight scenes are few, but they move the story along. It may not be that colorful (say ala Matrix or Wanted), but it is necessary to see the big picture.

I guess one of the strengths of this film is it's actors. Everyone pulled brilliant performances in this movie. Heath Ledger is legendary in this one. To be honest with you, I hated the actor specially with his choice of films (A Knight's Tale, Ned Kelly), but in this one... Perfect. I doubt anyone could ever play the Joker as effectively as Heath did here. The Dark Knight is definitely not a Batman film, it's actually the story of Harvey Dent and his fall from grace. Aaron Eckhart plays Two-Face just as perfectly as Ledger played Joker. I am just in awe when I finally see the face of Batman's other nemesis. Too bad, we won't be seeing him in the next sequel. Actually, everyone needs to be praised in terms of excellent acting.

Like with the past film, one of the things that takes away my joy in watching this film is Batman himself. Why do they insist on having him change his voice when he's in costume. It's like it's not even close to how Christian Bale is as Bruce Wayne. I know it's so that he won't be recognized, but it's too over-the-top. And one more thing, I'm not pro-Katie Holmes, but Rachel Dawes is supposed to be pretty. I have nothing against Maggie Gyllenhaal, because she portrayed the character very well. She even sounds like Katie Holmes, it's just that I've seen Batman Begins the other day, and she looks older... and not so prettier. Oh well. And oh yeah, I want more Two-Face. As I know that this is supposed to be a trilogy, I was actually expecting for the villain to have stayed longer. But alas, it seems that he's only bound for this one. His actual demise is rather easy, so it wasn't that satisfactory, given that the first half of the film is a build-up to Two-Face.

BUt you know what, these are shallow complaints. Nothing that could affect how I feel about the movie. It's still awesome!!!

Wow, I haven't done a movie review in a very long time. I think the last one was for Speed RAcer a few months ago. I've seen alot of the summer blockbusters, and most probably at the end of summer, I'll list down the 10 best films. But don't expect to see Speed Racer there.

SCORE: 10 out of 10

REPOST: THIS IS WHY IT'S BETTER TO COMMUTE

Yeah, I'm recycling posts. This is what you do when you're lazy (or if you hit a creative dead end). This was posted 2006, when no one was reading my blog. I thought why not, some of these anecdotes are tragic, but it's to my expense. Sorry. More senseless jibber-jabber from me. Enjoy!!!

**********

I've been a commuter since 6th grade, and there've been a few instances that I have shown my horns and tail. I am a nice guy in general, but then if provoked, I could be the long lost son of Lucifer himself. I'm tactless and brutally frank... I've made enemies back in the old days because I can't seem to take away the habit of keeping my mouth shut... But that's a whole different story...Today, I'm going to talk about my commuting horror stories...

STORY 1: I WAS TIPSY

So I was about to go home from a team-building (more like drinking party) in Makati. I rode the shuttle back to Parañaque and then there were these 2 pacoño girls who were in front of me... So the discussion goes like this (it was 2 years ago, so forgive me this is not accurate)...

Girl 1: I don't like sa Jollibee, kasi nakakasawa na food dun...

Girl 2: And I don't like the crowd noh. And di naman ako gutom eh...

Girl 1: Yeah, sa Starbucks na lang tayo... at least masarap pa pastries dun...

Girl 2: Right, and kahit bread land kainin naten, we always get full..(this conversation went on for like 5 minutes... it did not make sense... so finally...)

Me: Kaya kayo tumataba eh...(then there was like 30 seconds of silence...)

Girl 1: EXCUSE ME?!

Me: I'm s-s-so s-s-sorry miss, I'm drunk...

That's all I said, I don't remember if the girl slapped me, but I know the hour and a half long trip home was very uncomfortable... They stopped talking about food, but did not stop talking about my rudeness... Even the lady beside me was eyeing me cruelly... I think they all wanted throw me out of the van.

STORY 2: WHY I DON'T SLEEP IN BUSES ANYMORE

It's a habit of mine, since I take a bus ride going home, that I sleep for the greater part of it... And then there was this one time that I was really tired, I walked from the office to Megamall to the bus terminal (it was a long walk!!!), and I fell asleep... Moments later, I heard the ticket inspector saying "saan ang ticket ng boyfriend mo?" Then I felt my head being shrugged off by someone. Apparently, I slept on the shoulder of some guy that I didn't know... THat was embarrasing, (good thing I did not drool or something)... I think people around us were laughing... He did not notice also, cause I think he was asleep too... Or he liked it (hmmm...)

STORY 3: UNLUCKY WITH TAXI

I think that there's a conspiracy against me sometimes... I'm already late, but then on my way to work, every stoplight that we pass, when we're almost at the end of the road or street, the light turns red... As in EVERY SINGLE TIME!!! And then this dumbass driver has to take a different route going to EDSA... So instead of from Baclaran, we had to go to Buendia, then to some backalleys, leading to Magallanes then EDSA... My bill was already a hundred bucks and I'm not in the Makati Business District yet... I got off Ayala and took the MRT going to Ortigas... I just got out of the cab and threw away a hundred bucks... The sad part was, it was not even traffic in EDSA!!!

STORY 4: I DID NOT SAY THIS...

You know that in buses, there are seats that can accomodate 3 people and on the other side, can sit 2... So there was this one night, I was on my way to work and I sat on the 2 seater side. Along came this couple who didn't have anymore place to sit on because the bus was already almost full. The woman sat beside me, and the guy tried to sit on the other side. I don't know, but there are really these insensitive people who don't really budge so that others can take their seat (I also do that, but then again that's only if ugly people are trying to sit beside me... or people who smell like sweat)... So this guy got irritated with the woman because she wasn't moving, and said... "ANG TABA MO KASI EH!" I found that really hilarious, and I laughed. So the couple got off, leaving me to face the wrath of the immovable object... Yeah, I think I heard her chanting something in her native witch tongue... But that was uber-creepy... I wasn't able to look at her after that...

**********

What's your commuting horror story? Share mo naman...

SMELL ME!!!

One thing that I'm sure I got from my dad is my fascination with perfumes/colognes. WHen I was younger, and when he was still working abroad, their dresser was full of perfume bottles, some of which are empty. As I grew up, I started to have a collection of my own. It started with a bottle of Polo Sport, one of the more popular scents when I was still in high school.

When I started earning on my own, my collection grew more. There came a time when I have to have a new bottle every quarter of the year. I guess I'm fortunate because my aunt likes me a lot because every once in awhile she sends a bottle of perfume for me (I can't thank her enough). As of writing, I have over 20 bottles of perfume in my cabinet (that doesn't include the empty bottles). My quota for this year is actually already filled. Pictured above is my perfume cabinet.

The last time I wrote about my favorite scents was over two years ago, and a lot of scents came in by now. So I guess it's just high time for me to list down again my favorite scents. I'd also write down when I usually spray each one on me. I'm no expert in scents, so don't expect every details about the cologne/perfume that I'll be listing, ayt?!

RALPH LAUREN, POLO BLACK: This is one of my favorite scents ever. The scent stays on me for a very long time. I feel that this scent has power attached to it. I don't know, but I usually wear this if I have a final interview or if there's something important that involves work. The smell actually reminds me of a very expensive cigarette. I don't smoke, but it really does smell like it. And that's not a bad thing, because it really smells good.

MADE OF: iced mango, spanish sage, patcholi noir, sandalwood and tonka bean

GUESS MAN: The reason why I like this cologne so much is that it has a very nice bottle. It's unique, eye-catching and oh yeah, what's inside smells great as well. This is one of the gifts for me by my aunt. I was actually saving money to purchase one when I received this last year. The only downside to this one, is the biggest size they offer is only 75ml. I normally prefer 100 or 125ml bottles so I can use it longer. So for this one, I only use it for special occassions. Like for a birthday party or any private event.

MADE OF: Italian Bergamot, granny smith apple, fresh ozone, white pepper, ginger root, lavender, nutmeg, egyptian sandalwood, spiced amber, sensual skin musk and brushed suede.

LACOSTE ESSENTIAL: I love scents by Lacoste. For one, it's not as expensive as other designer perfumes/colognes. It lasts long on the skin and it really smells great. Red is for active sporty types, Pour Homme is for the yuppies, and Essential is great for all occassions. The smell stands out, and I put this on if I want to make a good impression. Let's say a first date scent. This particular bottle is very special for me, because it was given to me as a gift two Christmases ago. Oh and one more thing I like about it is that the scent returns everytime I become active (say walking, or whenever my body heat rises).

MADE OF: tangerine, bergamot, tomato leaves, cassis, patchouli, and sandalwood.

VICTORIA'S SECRET VERY SEXY FOR HIM: SExy. That's about all I can say about this cologne. By golly the first time I opened a bottle of this one, I got addicted. As in I sleep with a bottle beside me, and I sprayed some on my pillow. You know when I spray this. I get a lot of compliments from women when I spray this on me. One time, during my commute to work, there was this woman who actually sniffed me. There is a Very SExy for Him 2, but I don't recommend that one. It smells nice in the bottle, but once you spray it on, it smells different.

MADE OF: tangerine, pink lime, bergamot leaves, limewood, cinnamon bark, sage, vetiver and orange flower.

GIORGIO ARMANI ACQUA DI GIO: I got a huge bargain with this one. A friend of mine (a future featured friend) sold this to me at half the price in the market. Again, this cologne smells great, albeit a bit aquatic. The scent is really different from my other colognes/perfume. The only problem I have with this is that it doesn't linger very long. I only spray this on when I'm going out of town, where I have to bring the bottle with me so that I can spray again when I need to. Or if I'm going for a short engagement, say a job interview or something similar.

MADE OF: marine notes, mandarin, bergamot, neroli, persimmon, rosemary, nasturtium, jasmine, amber, patchouli, cistus.

CAROLINA HERRERA 212 ON ICE BLUE: Hmmm... This is one of the scents that I can spray on a daily basis. It stays long on my skin, and it does blend well if I start to sweat. It's great if you'll be doing outdoor activities or road trips because it smells fresh. On Ice has this citrusy smell as if you just stepped out of the shower. And it's not very expensive. When it comes to perfumes, I know how to haggle or at least get a lot of freebies so I can make the purchase. I think when I bought this one, I got a 30% discount as well as a bunch of testers.

MADE OF: grapefruit, fresh mint, sandalwood chord, insense and transparent musk

I love most of the scents in my collection. Some remind me of college (Cool Water, Perry Ellis 360 Degrees), some are great for night outs (Hugo Dark Blue, Eternity by Calvin Klein Marks & Spencer Isis), and some are just addicting (CK One Electric, Clinique Happy, Polo Blue and The Body Shop's Scent of A). And then there are some that just smells great (David Beckham Instinct and Thallium)As much as I'd like to write about all of it, I have other things to do.

18 USELESS SEX TRIVIA

The other day, I was bored in front of the computer so I searched for some useful trivia. Found this one instead. And thanks to Calvin Klein for the picture. Enjoy!!!

1. According to the Kinsey Institute, half of the men raised in farms have had a sexual encounter with an animal. (Si Bugoy kaya ng PDA?!)

2. Semen contains small amounts of more than thirty elements, including fructose, ascorbic acid, cholesterol, creatine, citric acid, lactic acid, nitrogen, vitamin b12, and various salts and enzymes. (di mo na kailangan mag clusivol araw-araw)

3. There are five calories in a teaspoon of semen. (weight-watchers take note)

4. At age seventy, 73% of men are still potent. (yan ang talagang may asim!!!)

5. According to statistics, Australian women are the most likely to have sex on the first date. (tara dun na lang tayo sa Australia!!!)

6. Women who are housewives are, as a whole, more faithful than working men (eh sino naman kasi makikilala ng mga babae? Naman!)

7. The most recorded orgasms in an hour by researchers at Center for Marital and Sexual Studies in Long Beach, CA, was 134 by one female and 16 for a male. (gusto ko magtrabaho dyan sa Center na yan)

8. The two leading causes of temporary impotence are prolonged cigarette smoking and tight pants. (sino kaya kilala kong mahilig sa dalawang ‘to?)

9. Orgies were originally religious events, being offerings to the gods.

10. In ancient Greece, women normally expose their vaginas to ward off storms at sea. (naku, kung nalaman lang natin ito ng mas maaga…)

11. Axillism is the act of using of armpit for sex. (ano to? Iniipit?! Bwahahaha)

12. Among sexually active adults, lesbians have the lowest incidence of sexually transmitted diseases. (Simula ngayon, pumapatol nako sa mga tibo!!!)

13. Three out of a thousand men are well endowed enough to fellate (blow) themselves to orgasm. (ano ka ba, gifted ka na, magsasariling sikap ka pa?!)

14. Over the same period of time, women who read romance novels tend to have twice as many lovers as those who don’t. (Finally, pag-asa sa mga nagbabasa ng Pinoy Romance!!!)

15. The Kama Sutra details techniques of ten types of kisses, 64 different caresses, eight variations on oral sex, and 84 positions for intercourse (huhulaan ko, ang gumawa nito, favorite book ang Kama Sutra… ang tiyaga magbilang ah)

16. It’s been estimated that the practice of autoerotic asphyxiation (temporarily suffocating yourself while masturbating) takes the lives of 250 to a thousand people each year. (Kawawa naman tong mga to, nagsasariling sikap na nga, mamamatay pa)

17. It’s been estimated that one out of two hundred women is born with an extra nipple. (For sure, useful yan pag nagka triplets ka)

18. The words naked and nude are not the same thing. Naked implies unprotected. Nude means unclothed. (isa lang ang term sa tagalog niyan, hubad!!!)

MANILA OCEAN PARK

Until yesterday, I've never been to Manila Ocean Park since it opened a few months back. From what I heard, it's a very kid friendly place. There've been a lot of oversized aquarium parks that have been opened in this country before, and they say that this is one of, if not the best.

Now the good thing about doing tourist guide duties is that you get to travel to places you've never been to before. And since I've heard of my cousin's plan of bringing her son to that place, I took advantage of the opportunity.

So Sunday afternoon I joined them in visiting the park. As you all know, Sundays are considered family days, so the place was packed. And since we were all first timers, we didn't know you have to get a number at the entrance first before you can purchase a ticket. LIke I said, the place was packed. We were 809th in the line serving at that time the 505th group. Crap!!!

So we ate at North Park. The good thing about the line, is that they serve customers quickly, so we waited only about an hour and a half. I know, it's a long line. Just a tip, if you want to visit the place, go on a weekday. It's P400 per adult and P350 for kids.

The place has about six spots: The Flow, Reef, Fishing GRound, The Living Ocean , The Deep and the 2nd Floor Activity Area. The Flow is the first part of our journey, where we got to touch starfishes and contains some freshwater fishies. The reef or Bahura showcased some Philippine fishes. The Fishing Ground has some deep sea fishes, while The Deep features different schools of fishes. One of the main attraction of the Park is the Living Ocean which is a 25-meter tunnel that showcases a wide variety of marine life and how they interact with each other. The 2nd floor meanwhile has the glass bottom boat ride area, shark viewing area and my favorite fish spa.

Anyway, the place is nice. Lots of fishies. I was happy to see fishes from Finding Nemo, but to tell you honestly, clown fishes are really boring. The real Dory is actually just like the character in the movie. I wanted to take a picture of it, but it was hyperactive. As in it was just swimming round and round inside her aquarium. And since I'm only using my camera phone to take the picture, I wasn't able to get at least a clear one. The whole time I was looking at Dory, I was saying "just keep swimming, just keep swimming." Seriously, it was just spinning around.

Being a natural jerk that I am, I got acouple of anecdotes from my trip there yesterday. Pardon my Tagalog. I tried to translate it in English, but it just doesn't sound good.

Mommy: Baby, look o fish. That’s his eyes. That’s his mouth. That’s his hands. (hala… mukhang interesting ang usapan ng mag-inang ito)
Anak: Saan yung nose nila?
Mommy: Hahaha, ang baby ko talaga. ANak, walang nose ang fish… hindi sila humihinga. Hahahaha
(Kawawang bata, anu-ano pa kaya ang tinuturo ng nanay na ito sa anak niya)

**********

Sa Fish Spa…
Girl: ayaw lumapit sakin nung fish.
Guy: Wag mo kasi galawin paa mo, kapag lumalapit sila sa’yo.
(di nga ginalaw nung girl yung paa niya… after 2 minutes)
Girl: eh wala pa rin eh
Guy: eto… (nilapit ni guy yung paa niya kay girl)
(Matapos ang isa pang minuto…)
Girl: ayaw talaga eh..
Guy: ang panget daw kasi ng lasa ng paa mo kaya di sila lumalapit
Girl: panget lasa ka diyan, ang sabihin mo ang dumi-dumi ng paa mo kaya ka pinagpipyestahan ng mga gurami!!! Loko!
(di na humirit si guy… at tinaas ang paa sa tubig)

MY TOP FILMS: LOLZ

This is a category of My Top Films that I really am having difficulty writing. There are a lot of brilliant comedians in the world, and as much as I'd like to write one film for each actor, it's a lot of work. Just so you know, I was really torn as to what I'd put on this list.

There's She's The Man (but I know it'll drown amongst the very funny movies here), Scary Movie (but then all of it's sequels and spin-offs were utter crap), Just Friends (I really like to put an Anna Faris film here, but alas), There's Something About Mary (if I could put 11, this'd be it), I'd also like to put a Will Ferrell film, but I can't think of any good one. There's a lot, Superbad, Kung Fu Hustle, School Of Rock, Knocked Up and Napoleon Dynamite, but there's not enough space here.

10. MEAN GIRLS: For me, Lindsay Lohan made only 3 good films, this one, The Parent Trap and Freaky Friday. But since Jamie Lee Curtis already made an appearance on my list, and The Parent Trap wasn't really laugh out loud funny, I settled for Mean Girls to be the one on the list. Add the fact that the brilliant Tina Fey wrote this movie about a home schooled girl from Africa trying to fit in in her new jungle called high school, this holds a special place in my heart. Rachel McAdams is here as well, and she's really brilliant as the Queen Bee. It could be mistaken for a teeny-bopper film, but it's actually quite mature even if it's in a high school setting. Simply put, this film is so fetch.

9. THE WEDDING SINGER: It's between this and 50 First Dates, both are cheesy, but I can't think of another Adam Sandler film worthy of this list other than Happy Gilmore. But 50 First Dates ranks higher on a different category so I decided to put this one here. Sometime during the 80's Robbie Hart sang during weddings, while struggling with his failed relationship. Enter Julia (Drew Barrymore), a waitress who's about to get married to a total dickwad. Of course Robbie falls for her, and needs to make her realize what a jerk this guy is that leads to a climax that involves an airplane, a musical number and Billy Idol. Sing it with me... "I want to make you smile...


8. CRYING LADIES: Who would've thought that Sharon Cuneta will have a spot on this list. This is one of my most favorite Filipino films of recent time. Stella is a woman trying to keep her son from being taken by social services so she gathers her friends to work as crying ladies for a very traditional Chinese wake. It's a little bit dramatic, but when you see Sharon trying different things to earn money, you'd laugh too.
7. THE 40-YEAR OLD VIRGIN: Steve Carrell is one of the funniest men in movies right now. I like him better than Jim Carey or Jack Black. And The Office is one of the best sitcoms on the air right now. This is the story of Andy, a 40 year old nerd who's never been touched... ever. THis film has subtle comedy which is kinda brilliant. This is the movie that put Judd Apatow in the list of brilliant comic creators. The waxing scene is hilarious!!! The driving scene was also a riot... and no... contrary to what others think, I can't relate!!!
6. DADDY DAY CARE: When I thought of other brilliant comedians, I thought Eddie Murphy. He's done a lot of laugh out loud films. But most of them are slapstick. I wanted a movie with a little substance. This is Eddie Muphy's best film ever. I like the guy when he does multiple characters, but for me this is the one that's really hit home run. It did help that the kids were also hilarious in this flick. Charlie Hinton just got sacked from his job, and has nothing else to do with his life... so he decided to open a day care center with his best buds Phil and Marvin.

5. AMERICAN PIE: Sex does sell. I think this is the first R-18 film that I've seen in my life. I think I was still a minor when this was first shown. I remember the usherette eyeing me and my friend suspiciously when we entered the cinema. I was really nervous watching it because I was afraid that people will just pick us up and throw us out in the middle of the movie. But then Jim started to play with that apple pie. And I think that was just the start of it. Even if the sequels were straight to dvd, the entire series was fun. A very funny coming-of-age story. My first time wasn't like any of their stories, but in a way, I was able to relate to it.
4. MEET THE PARENTS: When your name is Gaylord Focker, how do you think you'll be able to face the parents of the girl you're about to marry. Well, Ben Stiller is about to find out. This is my one of the best movies I've seen of all time. I loved every scene. Everyone played their roles perfectly, from Teri Polo to Blythe Danner to the amazingly brilliant Robert DeNiro. I was trying to think of a good Luke Wilson movie, none came to mind except for this one. I guess he's better off as support to Ben Stiller than as a lead. But this is just part one...
3. MEET THE FOCKERS: The sequel is SO much better!!! De Niro was funnier this time around, and he's got amazing chemistry with new players Dustin Hoffman and Barbra Streisand. This is one of the rare moments where part 2 is better than part 1. I love the story, even if Jack Byrnes (De NIro) became over-the-top. And who could forget the kid who says "ass hole." This one's a classic. Can't wait for the third one to come out. I hope it does push through... "Meet The Little Focker."
2. BRUCE ALMIGHTY: I cried watching this movie. I cried because I can't stop laughing. Specially Steve Carrell's scene the one with the "whpohodisyhtnoiyoilesyohleoy." Remember that? The funny thing is, If I'm given the chance to have God's power for a week, I'd do the same thing Bruce (Jim Carrey) did. Morgan Freeman is good as God, and Jennifer Aniston was perfect as Jim's girlfriend. I think this is the last good slapstick comedy I've seen in awhile.
1. BORAT: There is a reason why this is number one. This is the only film where I was laughing from scene 1 until the end of credits. Sasha Baron Cohen is a comic genius. Borat is a Kazakh journalist who comes to the States to study American stuff. From his joke class, to the etiquette class, to the whole kidnapping of Pam Anderson, I was laughing my guts out. I think the whole duration of the movie I was out of breath. Remember the scene where Borat and his producer ran around the hotel with nothing but the hair on their skin? Classic!!!

TRAVEL WITH JAJA

November 2005, I came in early to work to take advantage of the paid overtime. I went up to the 14th floor pantry, and there she was, reading some pharmacy book. I came up to her, she said she’s just refreshing her memory. Because you know, that’ll help her sell credit card protection once she hits the floor. At that time, I don’t know, but I thought I’d get along very well with this girl.

But then, she became my agent.
Joyce or Jaja to her friends came at a time when I was still handling teams for a call center in Ortigas. To say that she’s a performer would be a bit of a lie. She was rarely on time, much rarer to see her awake on the floor during calling hours. And it’s only on very rare occasions that you’ll see her name on top of the performer’s list. I’m not saying that she’s a bad employee, because I can always count on her to perform whenever there is money involved. But I guess the call center industry is not really what she was born for.

Hers is a face that should not be confined in a four-walled office space. It should be seen by the world. I guess the heavens heard and she got lucky, a few months after she left our industry, she was chosen to be a flight attendant for a very good international airline.

Joyce has been a good friend of mine ever since. She’s one of the handful of people that I get to talk to even after we’ve separated from our previous jobs. One that I decided to keep whether she likes it or not. Well, for one, she does bring home some very tasty chocolates from abroad.

For that reason alone, I decided to introduce her to you guys. I’ve written about her once before, but I think you need to know some of my friends much better. Hence, she’s my first featured friend.

Her figure doesn’t show, but she’s actually into sports, tennis, badminton, kayaking and jet skiing. She’s always game for a good road trip, specially if at the end of that trip involves food. She’s… what’s the term… kaladkarin.

More importantly, is she single? Ermm… hmm… “technically, yes I am.” She’s a girl, go figure.

Her love life’s a long story, and I only have a few spaces available for this post on my blog, so I shouldn’t be wasting space. I kid. But if you’re interested to know what she likes in a guy… “he should be smart, has a good sense of humor and someone who can make me fall in love with him every single day… someone who is true to himself and to other people.”
Asked about Joyce’s travels so far:

"Tunis, Tunisia: my first layover. I went out and had fun with newly found friends. we did a lot of things, bought some stuffs, went for shesha, argued with a psycho cab driver, walked under the rain, had coffee, had lunch in a nice looking resto where the food didnt taste good, had dinner in a not so nice looking resto but the food really did taste good, took lots of pictures, saw the country's president, but the funny part is everyone thinks i'm japanese.

Paris, France: Seeing the Eiffel tower gave me a very nice feeling. I almost cried, it was a dream come true. My stay in Paris was very short so I didn’t have time to visit the Louvre or walk along Champs Elysees.

London, UK: there's a lot to see and do in London yet the only places I went to were the Big Ben, London Bridge, and the famous London eye. What a pity!

Berlin, Germany: my favorite, so far! Everything is extraordinary!

Nairobi, Kenya: my advice to you is go to this restaurant, Carnivore, with an empty stomach!

I've been to other places like Singapore, Jakarta, Bangkok, Shanghai, Maldives, Manchester, New Delhi, Trivandrum, etc. but because of the lack of time i either just went shopping or stayed in the hotel. My travels could have only been better if I was with friends (aww how sweet)."

Asked about the craziest thing she did: “I watched a colleague have sex with an older guy for about 5 seconds (talk about being curious).” It was a long story, but unfortunately there were no juicy parts. So we’ll just leave it at that.

Unfortunately she hasn’t caught anyone doing the dirty deed in an airplane yet, but she’s looking forward to it. Apparently, she’ll just let them carry on with what they’re doing. She’ll probably get a phone and record it.
I’m fortunate to have Jaja as a friend. It’s not really hard to get along with her. These days, because of her hectic schedule, it’s difficult to catch her. But what I appreciate is that when you’re with her now, she makes up for the time that she didn’t spend with us, her friends.

She is worthy of being my first featured friend. I don’t have a best friend. I have best friends. And she’s one of them.

AMININ MO, MINSAN GANITO KA...

Naisip ko lang ito habang nag-iisip ako ng magandang opening para sa aking featured friend na si Jaja. Opo, mauumpisahan ko na mamaya yung artikulong ukol sa kanya. Maaaring bukas o sa makalawa ay malalathala na siya dito.

Pero draft pa lang ang nagagawa ko, kaya ipagpaumanhin ninyo muna kung ito ang isusulat ko. Hindi sa nagiging mapanghusga ako, pero meron talagang mga tao na kahit anung gawin ko, eh alam kong hindi magiging malapit sa akin. Siguro naranasan niyo na rin yung sinasabi ko. Yung tipong sa unang tingin pa lang, kahit di niyo pa sila kilala eh kumukulo na ang dugo ninyo. Di ko alam kung dahil ba ito sa kanilang pananamit, o dahil matining ang boses nila, o talagang ang mga aura namin ay sadyang magkaiba kaya nahihirapan akong lumapit sa kanila.

Di ko alam kung bakit medyo sarado ang utak ko sa mga ganitong klaseng tao, na sa palagay ko eh tama na yung unang impresyon na nakuha ko sa kanila. Pero alam kong hindi ako nag-iisang ganito. Ayaw man nating aminin, may mga pagkakataon talaga na hindi nating maiiwasang mairita sa mga taong hindi natin kilala.

Lalo pa siguro kung nasusulsulan tayo ng iba nating kaibigan tungkol sa mga hindi nila kanais-nais na mga kaugalian. Ang mga sumusunod ay ang mga taong para sa akin ay mahirap pakibagayan. Opo, laitero po ako.

ASIN: Isang taong hindi marunong maglagay ng deodorant at madalas may ilog na gumuguhit sa may bahagi ng kilikili o kaya nama'y may lawa sa likurang bahagi ng kanilang kasuotan. Bakit asin, kasi feeling ko, na kapag ang pawis nila ay natuyo, ito ay nagiging asin. Wala akong balak na sila ay amuyin. pero para sa akin, tama lang na lumayo ako sa kanila.

NAGMAMARUNONG: In short, epal. Yung mga taong mahilig makisali sa mga diskusyon, at kadalasa'y nagbibigay ng opinyon na tila sila lamang ang nakakaintindi. Yung tipong, mga taong mahilig magtaas ng kamay para lang mapansin, kahit minsan yung mga tanong nila eh walang kinalaman sa inyong pinag-uusapan. Borderline ng pagiging sipsip. Siguro insecure lang ako, pero ang sa akin, kung gusto ko magpa-impress, eh dadaanin ko sa sipag at sa husay sa larangan na aking papasukin, at hindi sa pagtatanong ng mga bagay na hindi na kailangang ipaliwanag o kaya'y walang katuturan.

MS. KILAY: Para sa akin, kapag ako tiningnan mo mula ulo hanggang paa habang nakataas ang kilay mo eh wala ka na. Lalo pa kung cheesebread yung mukha mo. Mabait ka man o hindi, para sa akin di ka na karapatdapat pag-ukulan ng panahon, dahil sigurado akong hindi tayo magkakasundo. Medyo ganun ako, pero hindi halata. Di ko gawaing matahin ang isang tao kagaya ni Ms. Kilay. Nagagawa ko yun, oo. Pero hindi halata... discreet kumbaga.

AUTISTIC: Hindi yung mga may kapansanan. Kundi yung mga taong kahit matino ang pag-iisip eh mayroong sariling mundo. Yung kapag nagsusulat, ay may naririnig kang kasabay na mga sound effects. O kaya nama'y nagsasalita ng mag-isa. Kadalasa'y mahilig sila magdrawing ng anime at may pagka emo ang hitsura... o goth ba? Ewan. Hinahayaan ko na lang sila sa sariling mundo nila... tutal dun naman sila masaya.

LAKAS MO: Eto ang weirdo talaga. Sobrang paniwala siguro sila sa nanay nila noong panahon na sinasabihan silang guwapo sila, kahit alam ng lahat na kabaligtaran ito sa totoong buhay. Oo, hanga ako sa kanilang lakas ng loob, pero naiirita ako sa pagiging manhid nila. Hindi nila napapansin na pinagtatawanan sila ng lahat ng tao dahil parang palaging sila'y lakas-tama. Yun bang tipong, mas natututwa sila kapag pinapansin sila kahit na pinagtatawanan sila.

BOBO: Sa mga taong ito nauubos ang pasensya ko. Natural na mahaba ang pisi ko, pero kapag napagpaliwanagan ka na sa pinakasimpleng paraan eh hindi mo pa rin makuha... lumayo ka na. Ayoko talaga sa mga taong slow. Hindi ko alam kung bakit. Gusto ko na nagtuturo sa ibang tao, pero kung hindi ka marunong makinig at hindi ka madaling makaintindi, kawawa sila sa akin.

Hindi masama ang ugali ko. Kung alam kong hindi ko makakasundo ang isang tao, hindi ko na pipilitin ang sarili kong lumapit sa kanila, dahil alam kong hindi ko mapipigilan ang sarili ko na magsalita. Mas gugustuhin ko pang maging suplado kaysa maging plastic.

BOREDOM

So okay, I still have a few weeks before I start my next job. Not going to say yet, what I chose... in time. Meanwhile, what am I going to do? Hmmm...

-I just saw my old notebook. Where I wrote a lot of short stories. There's still one that's unfinished. I don't remember how I wanted the story to end. And reading through, it was so cheesy, yeck!!! It was written during the days when I thought life was about being in love. Back when the idea of falling in love was everything to me. I'd like to go back in time and shoot that guy.

-Party... I don't remember the last time I got drunk... Actually, I do. June 15 of this year, we celebrated my ex-housemate's birthday. Ahh, I miss Marikina. Eventhough there's not a lot to go back to anymore. Seeing as my old program is slowly being dragged to the ground by the person who replaced me (or so the rumors say).

-Oh yeah, this weekend i'll be doing tour guide duties again. Finally, I'll be able to go to Manila Oceanarium... if you could see me right now, I'm giddy like a little schoolgirl -shiver-. Hopefully, this li'l job is going to be financially rewarding. At least, I'm sure now that I'll have a new bottle of perfume. I hope it's Polo Double Black or something by Armani. Anything but the scent of a Dirty Old Man.

-Or I could finish Grand Theft Auto IV. I think it's been a couple of weeks since I last played that game. Been busy with the whole job hunt thing. Yeah, I might just do that. Let's ruin my eyesight some more. Yes people, there are times my vision's getting blurred. I'm just waiting to have a medicard again. To lessen expenses. Glasses. It completes the whole geek look. But damn, I look good with glasses.

-The cordless phone is working again. God knows when was the last time I ever used it to talk with anyone other than my parents. I seriously think that we're paying the monthly phone dues for nothing. Phone pal anyone? Yes, as primitive as it sounds, I'm talking about the landline.

-I've got nothing to blog these days. Jaja, if you're reading this... "where's my article?!" Yeah, she's my featured friend. I think she's flying to Azerbaijan at the moment. I can't believe she's having a hard time answering the sexual positions part of my interview questions.

-Date. It's been awhile since I last dated. But then again, it's been awhile since I last got a salary. So I guess, dating is out of the question for at least two more paydays. I suck!!! Big time!!! I think I need to write about dating with a budget. No, I think I need to have a date first.

-Or I can help out with the household chores. But that's a lot of work.

MUST SEE TV: DR WHO

Tardis... Dalek... Time Lords... Cybermen... I bet none of those ring any bells? That's typical. Three quarters of the cyberpeople in this country, if they watch international television, are hooked on American series like House, Lost, CSI or god forbid... Desperate Housewives. When in fact there are also British created series that are much better than these American shows.

And one of them is Dr. Who. I've posted about this series about two years ago, I think (I can't find that post), when I first saw Season 1 of the series. This show is actually very popular in Great Britain and not just a cult favorite, I think it's more popular there than Lost. If my history is correct... give me a few moments. Let me look up wikipedia... it started in 1963 and was the longest running scifi show in the world. The first series ended in 1989. And what I'm watching these days are the episodes from it's relaunch in 2005.

So who is Dr. Who? Who is not actually the doctor's name... it's just The Doctor. He's the last of the Time Lords, a race of alien beings who travels among time and space to prevent disasters and at times change history. He's usually accompanied by a hot young lady in his adventures, and he travels using a blue police box called Tardis (Time And Relative Dimension In Space), which is larger on the inside than out. As for Cybermen and Dalek, they're the arch-nemeses of The Doctor. Dalek's are giant salt-shaker shaped robots built to exterminate all living creatures in the universe. While Cybermen are... hmm... think of Iron Man's original suit. As to what their purpose is... I forgot.

This is a very intelligent series, it's science fiction and it's funnier than most British comedies. I am not a fan of dry humor that the Brits usually have (if you've seen Shaun of the Dead, that's supposed to be a spoof of zombie films), but this show a lot of times kept me laughing. And most of the times at the edge of my seat, holding on to whatever pillow is near me.

There've been a lot of Doctors throughout the show's history, and they've smartly added a twist to explain the change in actors for the role. You see, Time Lords have the ability to change forms whenever the body is near death. Brilliant eh. So the story continues, even if the actor is no longer available. The current Doctor is David Tennant, and he's bloody brilliant!!! As for his lady friends, he tends to bring with him foxy women, with the exception of the latest season where he brought a slightly middle-aged lady (Catherine Tate). I think he opted for another lady after sort of getting too much involved with his last partner. Other leading ladies include Kylie Minogue (yeah THAT Kylie Minogue), Billie Piper (I think she was some pop star in the 90's) and Freema Agyeman (I don't know who she is).

I admit, this show may not be for everyone given that this is science fiction. But it is science fiction at it's best. Give this show a shot. If you're the type who likes Buffy or Angel, you'll enjoy the show. It's well-written. It's easy to follow even if it has a huge history. And it's really really good.

I know I'd sound like a nerd heavily promoting this show. I don't go to cosplays by the way. ANd no, I don't have a Star Trek costume stashed in my closet (I never liked the show). But if by loving this series gets me stereotyped into a geek, well that's fine. At least I have good taste.

Watch this show and you'll understand why I have all the love for the Doctor and all his antics.

Oh and by the way, the pictures are in order from first to last season. The first pic was for season 1 with Christopher Eccleston (The Rider in The Seeker, The Dark Is Rising) playing the title role.

DUMP SITE...

Last April I wrote about what happens to a guy after he gets dumped... This time, let's look at the other side of the dumping game. The dumper. Obviously, once he dumps a girl he'll just move on. But this entry is not about that. That's not interesting. This post is about how a guy goes about dumping a woman.

For a man, realizing that his partner may not be the right one is probably one of the hardest things to accept. I mean we've spent time, money and a lot of energy to woe her, so if we find out that our relationship is not working out, it's difficult.

Let me tell you, being a dumper is not easy. It's not only the girl you'll upset by the action, there's also her friends. People will call you cruel, cold-blooded, remorseless, stupid, ugly, and fat. You'll always be the villain, no matter what your reason is. So no, it's not fun at all.

This post is for the potential dumpees. A warning of sorts so you'll know when the one you're dating is going to dump you. Signs that your partner possibly had a change of heart.

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METAMORPHOSIS: You had so much fun on your first date. You found out a lot about your date that's interesting, and you share alot of common traits. Suddenly, a few days later, or a few sms exchanges after, he seems different. He becomes cold, distant, and at times even rude. That's what I call metamorphosis. Probably it's our way of giving you a chance to turn away so that we won't have to do the actual dumping. We show attitude that will turn you off so that you'll just go away. This is an art that needs perfecting because it has a downside for the dumpers.

You know how women tend to not shut-up about guys that did them wrong. Yeah, that's the downside.

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THE AFTERNOON THEORY: This is how I normally do the dumping. Because I'm a nice guy. This is sort of a long and slow process, so as not to hurt whoever it is I'm dating. Okay, say for example there's someone I met over the web, and we decide to meet each other personally. Normally, I don't date right away. I have to feel the person first, so that means a lot of texting and phone calls. But then after our first date, I realize that there really is nothing, I just lessen the communication. Text messages become less frequent, calls become rare, and before you know it, you just forget about the person. If there is a nice way of dumping a person, it's this.

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THE DISAPPEARING ACT: Similar to the afternoon theory, only quicker. Guys who do this have Harry Houdini's genes. Normally this involves changing mobile numbers. Travel abroad. And even a sudden event in the guy's life or career. It's like he just got sucked by the black hole or something. I'm not an expert, but the way I see it, we don't want to be cruel enough to do the actual dumping, and we're nice enough to actually not prolong the torment of doing the afternoon theory. Or simply because we met someone else.

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HONEY, WE NEED TO TALK: The worst way for us to dump somebody. If you think it's not hard for guys, think again. Imagine, we have to explain why we think it's not working out to women who 99% of the time don't believe us. They ask why, but won't accept the reason. Well, maybe because half of the time we're just full of shit... but in our mind, what we're saying is the truth. At least we didn't leave you in the dark. Even if you don't believe us. Painful, I know, but if you think of it, you'll be able to recover quicker than if we do something else.

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Which hurts more, being the dumper or the dumpee? Anyway whatever is better, there's always someone who'll get hurt. I believe in karma... nuff said.

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On a different note... UAAP season 71 starts today and NCAA SEASON 84 was last week... So good luck to my alma mater, NCAA reigning champs San Beda Red Lions!!!

GO SAN BEDA FIGHT!!!

200!!!

Crap, I really can't think of anything to write for this momentous post!!! THis is my 200th entry by the way, so I am thinking it should be super special. It should be something different. Something new. At least something... but alas, my troubled mind has nothing!!!

I can't say that I'm having a case of the writer's block. For one I'm not a writer. And two, I have a lot of ideas to post here. I've been around the blogosphere for quite awhile now, so there's still a lot to put here. And there's still a lot of pending posts I haven't started yet. So no, I don't have writer's block.

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Oh right, some thank you's are in order, but before that... a little bit of history. Half of my posts were written in 2006. Back then I had to post 100 entries for that year as part of my goal. I think it was one of only three that I was able to achieve. Most goals happened a year after. So anyway those were times when I didn't have any readers.

I think I've posted some decent entries back then, but most of them were sort of rushed because I was doing my blogging in the office. Just click on the archives part of this blog if you want to have migraine.

ANyway, this is supposed to be about thank you's. And for my blog I offer one huge THANK YOU to my dear readers!!! Most of you I don't know personally, so thank you for spending your personal time reading my rants, raves, opinions, and jokes, when you can visit blogs of much smarter and wittier people. I know some of you are expecting something tittilating, maybe one day. Ha! And thank you for the comments. Whether it's agreeing with my thoughts or otherwise, they're all greatly appreciated.

And thank you for not crucifying me at times when I sometimes say things that are inappropriate or insulting.

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200 entries. Wow. When I started writing for this blog, it was because at first I really wanted to bash on my clients. But then I found out that my boss was reading my posts, so I had to change topics. Looking back, I can't believe I've been recommended to be promoted twice after all the nonsense that I've ever said here.

Me and this blog's been through a lot. And just like my journal (the notebook one), it's nice to read through my old posts. I think I've grown alot as a person, and this is sort of a proof.

MUST SEE TV: HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER

I know... Again?! The last time I wrote about this show, it wasn't a review. It's more of a promotion for the handful of readers I have to watch this show. But this time around, it's going to be the proper review of How I Met Your Mother. No violent reactions please when I say proper... I'm not a professional writer... yet!!!

Obviously, this is one of my favorite sitcoms... ever!!! THis is so much better than Friends. ANd I place Friends in the holy grail of sitcoms. THe show is about Ted Mosby (Josh Radnor), retelling to his children how he met their mother. The thing is, after 3 seasons, we haven't actually met the mother yet. So for now we settle for all of the misadventures he's having with his wacky friends.

And wacky is actually an understatement. Ted's joined by his good buddies Robin, Marshall, Lily and Barney, all of which has a personality that is similar to mine. Robin (Cobie Smulders), is sort of sarcastic, and her being a Canadian actually brings comic relief as she sometimes can't understand all the Americanness (is that a word?) of her friends. Marshall (Jason Segel) is Ted's best friend and possibly the mushiest guy in the world. Lily (Alyson Hannigan) is Marshall's girlfriend and just like Buffy's Willow is sort of a geek... who's having lots of sex!!! And of course there's Barney (Neil Patrick Harris), Ted's other best friend, the ultimate wingman, and the funniest character of the show.

Anyway, to say that all their adventures are LEGENDARY is appropriate because it's not only laugh-out-loud funny, but everyone who's ever fallen in love will be able to relate to it. Yeah, the show tends to be cheesy most of the time, but that's fine. You won't notice it because you'll have an unstoppable urge to laugh every other scene.

True story, I'm a child of the eighties and nineties, and I can see that this show is written by people who's of the same age if not a bit older than I am. Finally, a show whose characters, whose childhood I can relate. Plus, there's the love for New York. I don't see myself ever living there, but sometimes it makes me wonder how my life will be if ever that happens. ANd one more great thing about How I Met Your Mother, the websites people visit in the show actually exists. Click here to access Barney's blog. And here for the Ted Mosby is a jerk website. A running joke on the second season.

And one more thing that I love about this show is that it respects continuity. Stories from season 1 are still discussed in the latest season. And one of my favorite arc (if I may say) is the 10 slaps Marshall has to give Barney after losing a bet. This started in season 2, and the running number is 3. For you to really appreciate the show, watch it from season 1, it'll be worth your time.

But the real strength of this show is on how they perfectly depict long-time friendships. It's like the cast really met during college. They finish each other's sentences. They know each other's hang-ups, their likes, what makes them tick. You'll really believe that they truly are that close. My friends and I are like that in a way, but I still envy what Ted and his gang has. It's ideal, and even if it's not perfect, it'd still make you wish you'll have your own Barney or Robin or Marshall and Lily.

So okay, to keep you up-to-date with the latest season before season 4 begins in September or October... SPOILER ALERT!!! Season 3 ended with TEd proposing to Stella (she's a doctor... highly doubtful that she's the mother as she's the actress in Scrubs). Ted and Barney's falling out came to an end after both Ted and Barney got into an accident. The falling out was because Barney broke the Bro Code by sleeping with Robin (Ted's ex). Apparently, Barney's starting to have feelings for Robin. Marshall and Lily bought a crooked apartment beside a sewage treatment plant. There's a lot to look forward to in season 4, and I honestly can't wait.

Suit up, and watch this show. It's legen-wait-for-it-hope-you're-lactose-intolerant-because-it's-totally-dary!!! I've been itching to write that line since I started writing this post. If you can't relate, it's high time you watch the show.

YOUR LIFE IN SIX WORDS

As I've been visiting alot of blogs lately due to my free time, I found a very interesting topic on WOW.

It's from a project from smithmag for a book or something. Anyway, the object is to tell your story in six words.

Here are some cute ones:

"I like big butts, can't lie"
"Joined army. Came out. Got booted."
"Cursed with cancer. Blessed by friends."
"No wife. No kids. No problems."
"Was lost. Then found. Now both."
"Love my job. Make no money."
"They hate me 'cause I'm awesome."
"Looked up. Saw sky. Bird pooped."
"Degree in English. I sell furniture."
"Life's instruction manual. Every page blank."
"Clever with numbers. Not with men."

As for me:
"Wanted adventure. Saw computer. Blogged instead."
"Wanton sex god. Needs some loving!!!"
"Single. Needs to get laid more."

Describe your life in six words?