BUSTED RADAR

My gaydar is busted. I don’t think mine ever works. I’m always surprised whenever someone comes out of the closet. Knowing that, I can’t sniff out people like us, unless they’re really out. But sometimes my ears wander, and the things I hear make me suspicious if the people who utter them are really straight or not. Or maybe I’m just malicious.

While in the FX:
Hunky PATTS Student 1: Napanuod ko kagabi si Jewel Mische, ang ganda niya ngayon pre.
PATTS Student 2: Yung sa TV Patrol ba yun? Sa channel 2 na daw siya?
HPS1: Oo. Ewan ko ba, mas maganda talaga siya ngayon.
PS2: Lahat naman ng lumilipat sa 2, gumaganda.
HPS1: Oo nga no, si Karylle. Ka-love team niya ngayon si Gerald
PS2: Ows? Ano na nangyari sa kanila ni Kim Chiu?
HPS1: Hiwalay sila.
PS2: Ah talaga? Sayang naman.
HPS1: Bakit pre, Kimerald ka ba?
PS2: Di no!!! Bea – John Lloyd to. Solid!!!
HPS1: hahaha. Ako Bea – Sarah.

Another instance in the FX:
Girlfriend: Bakit di mo sinasagot yung tawag ko kanina?
Boyfriend: Nanunuod ako ng Glee (this was I think a couple of weeks ago, the wedding episode).

And lastly, a few weeks ago at a colleague’s videoke party:
Cute Guy: (sings Too Many Walls)
Me: Is that guy gay?
Colleague: No. He’s straight. He just likes to sing 80’s songs.
Me: Ahhhhhh. Cool.

I’m confused.

Or disappointed.